Kanye East
with minor supporting characters Kanye North, Kanye South and the God of Awareness
There are many gods, half-gods and other divine beings amongst the inhabitants of Mount Olympus. There is the God of War, the Goddess of Love, the God of the Sun, the God of the Hunt and many, many more. Ironically, the god everyone always forgets about is the God of Awareness.
Now: how would you feel, being the God of Awareness, mighty and awesome and all, but with nobody aware of your existence? Yep, that's right: lacking any kind of notability among humans. Yikes, that would be pretty darn frustrating, mmmmkay am I right? Well, that's exactly the sort of thing the God of Awareness experienced. After going through a huge depression he decided to embark on a quest to raise the world's awareness to previously unreached levels. "Yeah," the God thought, "That'll teach them to ignore me! Humans will be aware of everything that happens within this world. Muahaha, they will all know my name and fear me. Oh, I'm so evil!"
However, the Ancient Greek Gods have become pretty old and fragile. I mean, the people they were assigned to be the spiritual guardians over have been dead for some 2000 years now. In short: the God of Awareness couldn't carry out his task alone and therefore created four apprentices who would carry out his divine quest. Every of these apprentices would be assigned a part of the world to increase awareness in.
The God of Awareness called these apprentices Kanyes. "Why would you name them Kanye?" asked one of his colleagues at Mount Olympus. "Well," answered the God of Awareness, "because I
can, yay!" The colleague walked away, mumbling "foolish old man...", but the name couldn't be changed anymore; the Kanyes were already shipped to the part of the world in which they were had to become missionaries of awareness.
To make sure they would blend in with the local population, all Kanyes were given the likeliness of the people who lived in their respective corners of the world. All granted a microphone, the voices of the Kanyes would surely be heard whenever, wherever, whatever. And in order to avoid confusion, the God all gave them their own name that referenced what part of the world they governed for the sake of awareness. Thus, Kanye North, Kanye East, Kanye South and Kanye West were on their way to their destination.
Kanye South was the first to arrive at his destination; Latin America. Needless to say, the outfit chosen for this Kanye was perhaps a little too familiar for the inhabitants of this continent.
Kanye North was the second one to arrive at his location: the North Pole. He was able to do some more work:
But it didn't take long before this Kanye also met his fate:
Kanye West went to the United States, but remained alive. With Beyoncé being eternally at the top of the Mount Olympian charts, Kanye West felt the need to point that out nobody but the 27-year old R&B singer with the royal behind should win the award
He retired immediately after that and became a fulltime rapper. Kanye West deemed he had helped the cause of the God of Awareness enough. Surely, by dictating what the superior taste in music was all inhabitants of the western part of the world should now be aware of the supreme awareness of the Kanyes who belong to the God of Awareness.
That leaves us with Kanye East, who was sent to Asia where he has spent decades increasing the awareness of the Asians. Travelling all over the place, this Kanye was at many key moments of Asian history:
Surely, Kanye East is the greatest apprentice of the God of Awareness. Kanye East is always where the action is. G.I. Kanye! Kanye catch 'em all! Yes we Kan-ye! God bless Kanye! Yee-haa!
