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Author Topic: Lawl. Game Cliches  (Read 1469 times)

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Lawl. Game Cliches
« on: May 25, 2007, 09:49:06 pm »
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Lol, look at this article:
http://pspupdates.qj.net/The-QuickJump-QuickList-The-ten-weariest-game-cliches-ever/pg/49/aid/92677

One of the comments:
"Wheres all the villian cliches?

They all have some crazy power trip, and have to take over the world.

"Ive got to take over the world for supreme powah! And to do that, I have to let the heros get dangerously close to beating me, but then ill just whoop out my super awesome invincible pants and put their asses to shame because no one can beat me! BWAHAHAHAH" [/sarcasm]

Not to mention just about every boss will tell you that he cant be beaten, cuz hes obviously THAT hardcore xD

Nice article."

In the words of our own Hyrule Boy...
I lol'd.

If ya got your own game cliches, post below this post ^_^
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Hm.
Re: Lawl. Game Cliches
« Reply #1 on: May 25, 2007, 10:55:34 pm »
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Yeah, they are all pretty acurate. What I also find stupid is that there are health bars. When you think about it. So if I am hit in the leg, it will drop only like 5 health? But it will still hurt like hell!
Don't worry. Just pick up a medkit from the ground and you'll be fine!

Or god forbid, just eat an Apple Gel! *smiles*
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Re: Lawl. Game Cliches
« Reply #2 on: May 25, 2007, 11:03:41 pm »
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List:
There is an all knowing crystal/star/disembodiedvoice who's power is being sapped, and tells you that you are the "chosen one" and must destroy the evil power.
"Dark realms"
Worthless coins, EVERYWHERE
Barrels.  Barrels filled with stuff.
People dont' care if you just walk into their houses
Amnesia at the beginning of the game
Eating food will restore your health.  ...   Where did this come from?  If you get shot in the chest, eating an apple won't take out that bullet, sew up the wound, and speed up several weeks/months of resting/healing instantly!
The "dark mysterious" character
Everybody has a task for you to do, with little to no pay.
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Re: Lawl. Game Cliches
« Reply #3 on: May 25, 2007, 11:59:49 pm »
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And ofcourse there is the infamous 'sleeping heals all wounds RPG cliche'. But I'm pretty sure that if you go to bed with fatal poison and internal bleeding you won't make it through the night.
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Re: Lawl. Game Cliches
« Reply #4 on: May 26, 2007, 04:16:19 am »
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Quote from: Kleaver on May 25, 2007, 10:55:34 pm
Yeah, they are all pretty acurate. What I also find stupid is that there are health bars. When you think about it. So if I am hit in the leg, it will drop only like 5 health? But it will still hurt like hell!
Don't worry. Just pick up a medkit from the ground and you'll be fine!

Or god forbid, just eat an Apple Gel! *smiles*
And if you die, we can bring you back to life, unless you dying is a crucial part of the story,
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Re: Lawl. Game Cliches
« Reply #5 on: May 26, 2007, 11:43:25 am »
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Actually, I have this even better list of "RPG" Cliches that you should look at, they make very
good points (there is 209 of them)
http://project-apollo.net/text/rpg.html
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Re: Lawl. Game Cliches
« Reply #6 on: May 26, 2007, 11:44:37 am »
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Quote from: Windy on May 26, 2007, 04:16:19 am
Quote from: Kleaver on May 25, 2007, 10:55:34 pm
Yeah, they are all pretty acurate. What I also find stupid is that there are health bars. When you think about it. So if I am hit in the leg, it will drop only like 5 health? But it will still hurt like hell!
Don't worry. Just pick up a medkit from the ground and you'll be fine!

Or god forbid, just eat an Apple Gel! *smiles*
And if you die, we can bring you back to life, unless you dying is a crucial part of the story,

'Remember Cloud...Fenix Downs are your friends...but keep in mind they don't aaaalways work...I'm looking at youuuuuuu Aeris'

Brilliant.
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Re: Lawl. Game Cliches
« Reply #7 on: May 26, 2007, 12:07:43 pm »
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Uber bad-guy: MWAHAHAHA! I HAVE THE ULTIMATE POWER! I CAN TAKE OVER THE WORLD ANYTIME I WAN'T NOW!
...
maybe after lunch...

Meanwhile the good guy infiltrates his base, and stops him somehow. Yeah, really smart <_<
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Re: Lawl. Game Cliches
« Reply #8 on: May 26, 2007, 04:39:07 pm »
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Yeah, you posted like, um, crap ones.

http://project-apollo.net/text/rpg.html
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Re: Lawl. Game Cliches
« Reply #9 on: May 26, 2007, 04:49:20 pm »
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Rofl, at both.
However, I prefered the one cbnumbers posted...
Quote
Just Nod Your Head And Smile
And no matter how big that big-ass sword is, you won't stand out in a crowd. Nobody ever crosses the street to avoid you or seems to be especially shocked or alarmed when a heavily armed gang bursts into their house during dinner, rummages through their posessions, and demands to know if they've seen a black-caped man. People can get used to anything, apparently.
INSTANT WIN!
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Re: Lawl. Game Cliches
« Reply #10 on: May 26, 2007, 05:31:07 pm »
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Bosses always have a "true form."
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Quote from: CeFurkan on September 10, 2010, 08:30:51 pm
well i dont have that system and it is very hard to care about everything when you are single
Re: Lawl. Game Cliches
« Reply #11 on: May 26, 2007, 06:34:06 pm »
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Bosses also always have big, glowing, sparkling, pulsating weaknesses (usually eyes)
« Last Edit: May 26, 2007, 09:19:23 pm by Kleaver »
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Re: Lawl. Game Cliches
« Reply #12 on: May 26, 2007, 08:00:41 pm »
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If I see a person with pulsating eyes, I'll run. I'll run faster if it's a pulsating crotch.
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Re: Lawl. Game Cliches
« Reply #13 on: May 26, 2007, 10:33:58 pm »
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Quote from: cb43569 on May 26, 2007, 08:00:41 pm
If I see a person with pulsating eyes, I'll run. I'll run faster if it's a pulsating crotch.

...King of the Cosmos? O_o
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i love big weenies and i cannot lie
Re: Lawl. Game Cliches
« Reply #14 on: May 26, 2007, 11:48:09 pm »
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How about good ol...
Were going to blow up the world now, with my ub3r deathray!
Omg guys, look, its preparing to fire!
5 Minutes Left..
**Wastes 30 minutes on a mission**
Omg, you have discovered my secret base!
but your too late now!  Theres only 30 seconds left :)
**Beats machine, but takes himself 20 minutes**
Oh damn, my counter must have broke :)
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Hm.

Dascu
Re: Lawl. Game Cliches
« Reply #15 on: May 27, 2007, 09:46:35 am »
Quote from: Kleaver on May 26, 2007, 11:44:37 am
Quote from: Windy on May 26, 2007, 04:16:19 am
Quote from: Kleaver on May 25, 2007, 10:55:34 pm
Yeah, they are all pretty acurate. What I also find stupid is that there are health bars. When you think about it. So if I am hit in the leg, it will drop only like 5 health? But it will still hurt like hell!
Don't worry. Just pick up a medkit from the ground and you'll be fine!

Or god forbid, just eat an Apple Gel! *smiles*
And if you die, we can bring you back to life, unless you dying is a crucial part of the story,

'Remember Cloud...Fenix Downs are your friends...but keep in mind they don't aaaalways work...I'm looking at youuuuuuu Aeris'

Brilliant.

This is why FFV rocks. They make fun of this cliché. When *SPOILERPERSON* dies, they try to use Phoenix Downs and Cure3 on *HIM,ITORHER*. But it doesn't work and then they cry. So did I. That scene is a shitload more dramatic and sad than Aeris' death. It's just not in flashy 3D or FMVs, so people don't appreciate it.
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Re: Lawl. Game Cliches
« Reply #16 on: May 27, 2007, 03:35:15 pm »
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Quote from: Dascu on May 27, 2007, 09:46:35 am
This is why FFV rocks. They make fun of this cliché. When *SPOILERPERSON* dies, they try to use Phoenix Downs and Cure3 on *HIM,ITORHER*. But it doesn't work and then they cry. So did I. That scene is a shitload more dramatic and sad than Aeris' death. It's just not in flashy 3D or FMVs, so people don't appreciate it.
I agree. It also really sucks when Spoiler.
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