Mmm. I'll try to be as constructive as possible.
Like Kylink said, try not to make every note the same length, it makes it sound so boring. Music needs variety, make sure you add it.
Mabye a different choice of instruments? Don't always just use the first instruments you come across, make sure you use ones that compliment each other.
So many dissonant chords, my ears
. Fortunately (and sometimes unfortunately) I've got an ear for music, I can hear straight away what sounds good and what doesn't. Unfortunately, if you ain't got it, you ain't got it. In that case, learning a little music theory wouldn't hurt. And make sure you listen to a lot of music, as that will really help you build a style.
Sometimes dissonant chords can really add a feel to the piece, but too many and it's ruined.
Anyway, keep trying, it takes a long time to be able to make things that sound really good.